By – Lois Peters
As a child, i remember our youthful pranks. We saw it as a game that we often play amongst ourselves then. See, i am the last born in my family and by right of being last, i naturally believed that there were benefits that should accrue to me based on my position in the family. Benefits like; petting from all in my family, provision of all that ill ever want or need, excuse from chores, you know, and be allowed to just be and just enjoy the sweat of others. But most unfortunately, i think it doesnt occur in every family. And mine was one of the families it didnt occur in. Whether it was because of my looks, my naturally perceived strength or whatever, but some how, the bulk of the work was always mine to execute. And this, i didnt like or appreciate. And seeing my compadres experiencing the life i could only dream of, i decided to come up with a way of escape.
Adore was my closest pal then and of course, partner in crime. We sat and contrived a means of excusing ourselves from every hardship or whatsoever responsibility that came with being the youngest in the family, for example, washing of plates. I so hated washing plates cause i felt it would always take me out of the scene to the backyard where id sit alone and be doing dishing whilst every other person would sit in the parlor gisting or watching movies. So it was game on when Adaora and i finally came up with giving incessant excuses to flee responsibility. The fun part was the pity party that followed and talking about it with my friends, how we would make jest of the looks on their face and the unsolicited attention we would eventually get. In retrospect now, i really think it was a call for attention and care. We would sit and laugh at the excuses we gave our parents, brothers and sisters and my dear, this made my childhood experience worth while.
But as i began to grow, i saw a similar pattern; i had begun giving excuses for virtually everything in my life. A childish way of thinking and acting had gradually become my involuntary habit and ideology in life.
The mindset of being the last born who was supposed to have everything already made for her permeated the fabrics of my being and got me irresponsible for i waited to rip the fruits of others handwork and labor. And got angry whenever it doesnt happen. I gradually slipped into waiting for handouts, hand downs and a pity party that should understand that i am the last born and should have things done for me. After a harsh situation i faced way back in university, it then dawned on me that no one, absolutely no one gives a hoot about your position in the family or even as much as care whether you are a girl/lady, you must take responsibility of your life. So terrified, i gradually crept into depression, cause things werent moving right as i thought. My childhood pranks could no longer save the day, where was Adaora to save the day? i often questioned myself, what could i do and not at this time when the familys finances had meet a downward spiral, i became stagnated, for i had not learnt the art of taking responsibility for anything, neither did i have a clue at it. As a child, excuses got me going but now, excusing got me drowning.
The beauty of life is not in the avoidance of mistakes but in the actions we take after a mistake had been done.
This truth i learnt in the hardest of ways but however, i learnt all the same.
I found myself making excuses for everything. i had so grown besotted to wiggling out of situations that it became my default response to life but then it was killing me. I had dreams in my heart and passions tugging at my core but i could never bring myself to achieving them because i made excuses for everything. I had the perfect excuse for not achieving my results, grades and productivity and some how, i believed that the world should understand my plight. Unfortunately, every other person was busy painstakingly building the life of their dream whilst bathed in the pool of excuses. But i wanted more
The world statistics is replete with youngsters who have dreams but never realize them. We often ask question why there are very few people at the apex of success and so many at the base of struggle and pain. The truth is that, these people who rise above the status quo achieved that feat by refusing to accept the excuses that crept into their minds. And for the records, these excuses are valid but you know as a wise man said, theres no reasonable reason not to do what is right! But you must convince yourself otherwise if you must experience any life.
Oh! my phone went bad, so i couldnt continue with my vlogs I dont have a laptop, so i can write, I come from a poor family so i cant make it in life, Im a lady and ladies cant attain a certain height in life, Oh i dont have money, so i can attain the training, Oh this oh that
Might i add that i was once in this categoryscratch that, i always find myself in this situation till date but i have grown and are still growing to break free from the plays of my childhood; my favorite excuse.
Everyone of us have that excuse they often give that has become their consolation to throw a pity party but can i tell you that your excuse has no validity when contrasted with your destiny, as a matter of fact, when you place them side by side, they pale with significance.
I dont know the reason, i dont know the excuse that you have called bae, but you must divorce that relationship, if you must experience the dreams in your heart. They were never meant to be just dreams, wake up to reality and live them, there is a beauty and shimmer that comes with achievements and the sense of realized dreams. But would never know this feeling until you breakup with your current lover just so you can cleave this beautiful lady in the future called success!
Whats your favorite excuse?
I dont have a phone
BREAK UP NOW!
To your success, i take a bow!