By – Pleausre Chizoba
Hello peeps, I trust that we are having a great week. I’ve been thinking lately about friendship and those who are friends. Life’s realities confirm that no man is an island. Sometimes, it can become so unbearable that we wish we could live in isolation, protected from the barbs of others. Alas, we are created to be social beings and being left alone only decreases our standard of living. Our need for one another often forms the basis for friendship. People need people.
Building on that premise, I can say that Friendship is something of immense value being placed in our hand.
Firstly, we need to know that friendship must be defined. It must have a purpose. Therefore, the purpose of friendship must be in line with your value system. Initiate friendship at a casual level, define your boundaries and allow your value system to determine your intimate friends. If any kind of person—different convictions, strange outlooks or incompatible dreams can become your intimate friend, it’s often an indication of a loose value system. Defining the purpose of a person around you will help get the best from it and put your excesses in check. For example, Peter came around to give Jane piano and voice lessons. Jane: “Stick to that purpose and don’t make him your visitation partner”. You should build godly relationships with friends and not mere acquaintances. With your friendly disposition, you can turn many strangers into casual friends, but with your values and convictions, you turn the casual friends into few intimate friends. The litmus test is simple common ground.
Friends stick to you by choice. Proverbs 18:24 tells us “A man who has friends must himself act like a friend but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother”. They believe in you and personally volunteer to see a dream in you become a reality. Friends should not just be a colleague at work or a course mate; they must add value to your life. A true friend sticks to you—not to your money, body features, talent, gift, connections or perceived favors. They stick to you with the sublime motive of bringing out the best in you for the purpose of fulfilling a target or maximizing your talent. Even when the chips are down, they are still there.
Again, friendship should never compromise values. No friend should become too precious to make you loose your place in destiny . Ask Amnon.
The concept of friendship needs exploration because often a man is known by the company he keeps; knowing the company helps one to know oneself and develop his personality to the fullest. Each of our friend mirrors a rejected or acknowledged trait in us. Never be afraid of your convictions. That is your identity.
“Never apologize for having high standards. People who really want to be in your life will rise up to meet them”.—Ziad K. Abdelnour. There are no perfect friends, hence we should make room to accept their flaws.
It’s imperative to know that communication is an important tool in friendship. Communicate clearly what you are feeling. Honest communication leads to the right expectations. Always speak frankly about the way you feel. This ensures that your friend understands you for who you are. It also ensures that there is complete acceptance and trust in the friendship. The more acceptance there is, the easier it is to trust. Eventually trust is the basis for any strong friendship. But to develop trust you need to communicate clearly and be non-judgmental. Make sure you do your best to nurture friendships.